Saturday, July 11, 2009

The hope of glory..

Colossians 1:27
To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.

I look for outward signs of God to manifest themselves, so that my faith may be strengthened. The physical protection from harm and the barriers from disappointment and sadness. Sometimes they are there, and sometimes I am left wondering why the heck God isn't doing more. Yes, I do. I get mad. Even though I know that God doesn't owe me anything, I still feel like "people" who love you should look out for you. So it's hard for me to feel like praising when I am in a situation that seems like it's never going to change, or if it does, it will be for the worse.

Believing God is not my strongest virtue. I tend to pray and then I am surprised when prayers are answered in obvious ways, but not surprised at all when I don't see the answer I was looking for.

So I have been a little down lately, just involving life, work, and relationships..but then I realize that I do have hope..and it IS evident. Christ is IN me. My reactions to the things that get me down are so different than what they were even a year ago. Honestly, I can say that I am leaning on the Lord, even though I am hurt (and upset with God). I know that he is the only One that I can trust. Not alcohol, not men, not complaining. This is a joy to me..a quiet joy that doesn't come with a smile, because I am still sad..but it is boostering my faith and giving me the strength to serve God and praise Him because this is "Christ in me, the hope of glory" that is proof that one day I will be face to face with Jesus.

The joy of the Lord is my strength.

Sunday, July 5, 2009


There are times when I cry because I long to see you face to face so badly that I don't want to wait another day.

There are times when I turn to other things to fill the space that belongs only to You.

My deepest desire is that I would desire You above all much that letting go of earthly things would not seem so catastrophic.

My soul yearns to sit at Your feet and just breathe You in..until something catches my eye and I turn my face from You.

God, grant me a disciplined heart and a reigned-in mind. Take my life and make it into something useful. Give me a true and trustworthy perspective, and discernment to choose as you want me to. I trust you with my life, and God with my death. Every breath I breathe is worthless unless I am breathing for you. Move, God! Act, God. Cause me to act in a manner that brings nothing but glory to Your name. Call me to action, and give me the boldness to follow.

Jesus, be the reason I smile in the morning, the patience in my interaction with others, the hand that rises up to supply the needs in Your body. Give me a fire that never goes out, an undying passion for You and Your word, a heart that is perpetually broken for the lost, the sick, and the hungry.

In your wholly holy and unblemished Name.